Over You
by AJ and Sebastian Goin
Summary: 8 years later and he still hasn't managed to get over Kate's death, but with help, he can move on.


AN: Written based on the prompts from JenJen "Over You, Kate and Tony". Also, we now have an official Facebook page. The link is on our profile so check it out and like us!

Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or its characters. Nor do I own "Over You". But if someone wants to get me Tony, Ziva, Blake and Miranda for my birthday, I will gladly accept them!

Dedication: To Grandpa Gil and everyone who we have ever lost that still owns a piece of real estate in our hearts.

Song: "Over You" by Miranda Lambert (written with Blake Shelton)

Spoilers: While this is set in late Season 10, the only spoilers are for Season 2.

* * *

_Verse1_

With a sigh, Tony set his now warm beer on the table and picked up the picture he'd set there. It was a picture he looked at exactly one day a year. The picture was of him and Kate, the year the team had spent Christmas together, less than six months before …

One day a year is all he would allow himself to pull out that picture, to feel that pain again. When he allowed himself to think of her like that, his mind would take him places he couldn't handle for it to go. He could close his eyes and see her fall between himself and Gibbs. He could feel the spray of her blood on his face.

_Chorus_

It was eight years later and the pain still had the ability to leave his heart feeling raw in his chest. On a daily basis, he pretended to have moved on, just like everyone else expected him to. In reality, he was far from 'over' the loss of Caitlin Todd. He doubted he ever would be. She would always be a part of him.

_Verse2_

Tony stood as the record reached the end. He crossed to the stereo and carefully removed the black disc, sliding it back into its sheath before selecting another. The records had been hers. So had the player. As the sounds of jazz once again filled his apartment, he returned to the couch and the picture.

He barely even remembered Abby snapping the shot. He'd been too busy laughing at something ridiculously stupid McGee had said. But it was the only candid shot that existed of the pair of them where neither was glaring at the other. It reminded him of the 'post plague' them. In that short period of time after he had almost died, their relationship had been different. They'd put aside all pretense, the jokes, the teasing. They'd just been friends, partners, and family. And then…

_Chorus_

When the guilt had finally ebbed, he had felt so alone, for so long. That feeling of isolation had been much slower to ease and had little to do with coming to grips with things himself. And he still felt that overwhelming sense of seclusion on a regular basis. Lucky for him, someone else had developed a kind of sixth sense for him being in that mood and tended to show up just when he needed her. And right now, he felt like he needed her.

He could call her, but he didn't really need to. She had her own rituals for this day to complete, and then she would be on his doorstep like always. Abby's grief drove her to Kate's grave with a need to talk to their lost friend. She'd stay there until sundown, then would come to comfort him.

At some point along the way they'd acquire McGee too. For the last couple of years, he'd been joining Abby at the cemetery. He'd tried inviting Tony, but that was a place he couldn't go.

_Bridge_

Sitting in front of her headstone was more than he could handle on this day. He made his visits to Kate monthly the rest of the year. Sometimes more often. But on the anniversary of her death, it was too much to bear.

The knock didn't surprise him. He was ready for it. And he was ready for the force of Abby slamming into him when he opened the door. What he wasn't ready for was the third person who trailed into his apartment. Behind Abby and McGee was Ziva, and he had no idea why.

_Chorus_

He didn't have to wait long to find out though. As usual, Abby had brought a bottle of Kate's favorite wine to toast her memory. When he excused himself to the kitchen to open it, she followed him.

"If I am intruding I can leave."

He glanced back out at the living room then turned to look at her. "Why did you come?"

Her casual shrug contrasted with the serious look in her eyes. "They did not invite me. I realized what today was and I thought…I thought maybe you did not want to be alone. I came just in case you needed me. I bumped into Abby and McGee downstairs and they insisted I come up."

He considered her words as he pulled the cork from the bottle. He opened the cabinet and extracted four wine glasses, knowing that the simple action would be answer enough for her. Tonight he wanted to feel like he wasn't alone and she, more than anyone, knew how that felt. And alone was the last thing he felt when she was near.

After filling all four glasses, he set the bottle back on the counter. In an instant she was at his side, taking two of the glasses and taking them back into the living room.

While he was finally starting to be okay, he wasn't ever going to get over Kate, but he didn't want to. She had made him realize that he didn't want to be alone in life anymore. And finally, he wasn't.


End file.
